Wednesday, August 18, 2010

My Forty Sixth Date

He found me on jdate 3 months ago before I stopped going online. We exchanged bbm’s. He lives half the year in one state but his family lives here and so does he for the other half. We spoke a few times but it never worked out to meet. When he was in town I was busy or I was out of town and it just never worked out. After I got back from Israel he messaged me and told me that he was back in town for the next 4 months and would love to finally meet me. We made plans for Friday night but he ended up asking if we could change it to Saturday. I was fine with that because the rabbi had asked me to come over anyways (that’s the night I was over til 2 am and cried my eyes out). So the next night I met him. I had promised the rabbi to go with a good attitude and not to dismiss him for shallow things, like I had been doing on every date.

He was not as tall as I usually like and he was balding; both things that would have not gotten him a second date in the past. But I didn’t pay any attention to it. He took me out for a beautiful dinner and salsa dancing. He was not a great dancer but he couldn’t have cared less! He had so much confidence! He was a gentleman. He opened doors and arranged the whole evening. We had great conversation and time was just flying by. After dinner he told me that he needed to walk his dogs and asked if I wanted to join. I didn’t want the night to end so I went with him and his 2 dogs for a walk. He didn’t try anything. He was respectful and kind and gentle. All qualities I have been saying I want (like my ex was) and yet going out with the opposite of that. As soon as I left I got a bbm message saying “You looked absolutely beautiful tonight”. It was so sweet and simple and I finally was in a place where I was able to hear that form someone without dismissing him as a desperate nerd. He asked me to let him know when I got home safe and I couldn’t wait to get home to call him. His first question was “when am I taking you out again”. He was so assertive and confident and I just really liked him. I told him that since it was my sister’s wedding the following weekend, I was going to be very busy and that my only free day was Monday. He said perfect, I will make a reservation at a cool place right away. I was so not used to someone that was taking charge and making all the plans and wanting to make me so happy. We went out Monday and had an even more incredible time. We went to a really cool place and held hands for 3 hours. I felt like a teenager, getting excited about holding hands. Our chemistry was insane! We kissed that night at the table and it was a perfect first kiss. Wednesday night some cousins came in from out of town for the wedding and I invited him out with us. I saw him again Thursday and again on Friday. Sunday was my sister’s wedding. I debated inviting him but decided against it. It was too soon and I wanted to take it slow. I didn’t want to attract any evil eye to jinx this. And I didn’t want all the crazy old people to ask him when we are next after only knowing each other for a week. He came over while we were taking the pictures and took my dog for the entire day cause he didn’t want me to have to worry about her while I was so busy. HOW NICE IS THAT?!?!? He kept looking at me like he had never seen a more beautiful girl in his life. I felt so amazing! He then picked me up from the wedding and drove me home. He came in for a bit and we just lay in bed together kissing and cuddling. We kiss great together. I saw him again on Monday and today he left for a trip for two weeks. He told me he has never felt like this before and that he wants me to come with. I told him he was crazy and that it was too soon, even though I sooo wanted to go with him. He told me that he was going to miss me like crazy even though we just met. He left and I miss him. It sounds crazy but I miss him. I really do. Keeping my fingers crossed for this one. I have a really great feeling about him. He treats me how every woman should be treated and it is nice not to have a heavy heart for once. I told him all about my story with my ex and how the night before I spoke to the rabbi and had we gone out Friday instead of Saturday it would have been our first and last date. He kissed me and told me that he believes that everything happens for a reason. And he asked if he could send the rabbi flowers to thank him, lol.

The scariest part is that the night before I met him, I prayed for a Jewish version of my ex and he treats me even better (so far) and has the same ideas about a relationship. The most insane part is that I asked him his Hebrew name and I almost burst into tears when he told me.... it’s the same name as my ex. Quite literally the Jewish version of my ex, just like I asked for.

Just when I was about to give up on G-d and Judaism and this experiment, G-d threw me a curve ball :)


  1. ok, I just got goose bumps reading this! I am very happy for you!

    And as far as looks go, I'm glad you gave this guy a chance. Most men get old, lose their hair, gain weight, etc. It is the man they are inside that matters. I stand up for the bald men of the universe! My father and brother are both mostly bald and they are two of the kindest men I know. And I know that my mother, and whoever my brother ends up with are lucky lucky women.

    I wish you all the best!

  2. The last paragraph gave me chills! Congrats, I can't wait to hear how things go.

  3. ya same I also got chills from that.. it's crazy how everything happens in life and I also believe everything happens for a reason..

  4. Yay! I have been following this blog from the beginning and I'm very happy you found someone you can see yourself with far down the road. The only negative thing I have to say about it is that this guy probably doesn't want to be considered a "jewish version" of anyone...but himself. Ex boyfriends obviously can influence and change your life, but maybe let this guy stand on his own, without the comparison. :) Good luck!

  5. I am so happy for you. I pray things work out for you xoxox.
    Really take your time with him and get to know him slowly.
    I have read a few of your posts which are very funny and cute. It seems a bit like you've been groped and kissed a bunch of guys who you didn't really like. You do not have to do any of that to keep their interest and you should not have to accept that kind of treatment. It almost borders on molestation and harrassment (so goes the unfortunate dating scene of today - I went through it too in the past). It is almost like you have survived one battle after the other. Hopefully, this guy is the one !!! Keep the faith and enjoy your new romance.

  6. We need another update!

  7. ya seriously, we've made it to 46 dates and 12,000 updates...give an update!

  8. :D twinsssssssssssssss

  9. B - I've been following your blog since the very beginning and I am THRILLED to hear that you found someone so wonderful! From your more recent updates it sounds like things are progressing in a fantastic way. You seem truly happy. Keep enjoying!

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